AAVR Magazine

Point: Why grow a beard?

This article is the first of a two-part series, where Justin and Ryan will be debating the merits of long, bushy beards.

Now, were not talking about the short and trimmed "No play for Mr. Gray" beard, were talking about something like this gentleman on the left–Long, bushy and everywhere. Ryan will be taking the scary as hell side. Justin will be taking the cool and sophisticated side

Ryan point
When I look at this guy I think of two things: He’s either homeless or he lives in New Hampshire meaning hes a scary lumberjack. Those are the only 2 reasons to have a beard this long and out of control. I would also say this guy probably dosen’t shower much. Why? Because thats usually what i think when i see a big out-of-control beard. They are just nasty.

Why? Well first of all, they are hard to keep up, meaning things often get caught in them  including food. Ever see some guy with a big beard that dosent know some of his lunch is still in there? It’s not a pretty sight. Sometimes even birds nest in these horrible things, I know that’s a family guy reference but im sure its happenned somewhere to somebody, probably to a hobo but none the less. 

Another thing is I dont know if youve ever stood next to someone with a beard near the end of the day, that thing smells. Mostly because its very close to your mouth and keeps in the odors when you have bad breath. I think its just commonplace in the American culture to be cleanly shaven and if you want some facial hair to keep it short neat and tidy, like the dad on family ties. He always had a neat short beard and it made him sophisticated, but why didn’t he have it like this guy? Because he would have looked homeless.

The Bottom Line: I do not think if your facial hair is longer then the hair on top of your head that it shows sophistication in any sense of the word. It just gives the impression of terrible hygiene and probably a foul stench to go along with it. Thats my 2 cents.

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